Church Parking Lot Sign: "FOR MEMBERS ONLY" Trespassers will be baptized!

No God - No Peace...Know God - Know Peace!!

"Free trip to Heaven - Details Inside"

Try our Sundays - They are better than Baskin Robbins!

Wanting a new look? Have your faith lifted here!

An ad for one church has a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that reads, "For fast, fast relief, take two tablets!"

When the restaurant next to a church put out a big sign with red letters that said, "Open Sundays," the church reciprocated with it's own message, "We are open on Sundays, too!"

People are like tea bags-you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are.

God so loved the world that He did not send a committee!

When down in the mouth, remember Jonah, he came out alright!

Sign Broken - Message inside this Sunday!

Fight truth decay - study the Bible daily!

How will you spend eternity? Smoking or Non-Smoking?